The Search for the Crumple-Horned Snorkack
by JackPotr
Summary: After the final battle with Luna taking control. One-shot.


Disclaimer: No, I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters depicted here.

AN: Just another one-shot. Hope you enjoy!

The fall of Lord Voldemort was the cause of much celebration throughout the Wizarding World as the struggle had caught the attention of the entire world. The final duel between Harry Potter and the Dark Lord was as awe inspiring as it was terrifying for those who were there to witness the epic battle. The amount of power that was thrown between two of the heaviest hitters in the Wizarding World took its toll on the victor in the end but at last report, Harry Potter was still alive even though he was in a deep coma.

With the death of Lord Voldemort, the darker side was finally defeated but at a heavy cost to those of the light side and the air in Hogwarts was heavy with grief as families joined together in mourning the loss of so many brave witches and wizards. Hogwarts and the surrounding area had been the focal point of the final battle and it and the village of Hogsmeade had suffered greatly. Both the castle and village were in ruins and would take quite a while to rebuild if it could ever be returned to its pre-war condition.

While the rest of the country and world were celebrating, the defenders of the castle were left to pick up the pieces of their lives and the once great castle. The grounds of the castle, the village, and the road in between were littered with bodies of the fallen. The defenders were in such an exhausted state that it took a day before the monumental task of dealing with the bodies and burying their dead could be started. The land beside the road served as the graveyard as the light sided defenders buried their dead along it to serve as a reminder to future generations of the sacrifice made on their behalf.

It was almost a week later and most of the fallen light side warriors were laid to rest. Headmistress McGonagall, transfigured rocks into shrines on each end claiming them as heroes of Hogwarts. The grounds of the castle were beginning to clear of the bodies and a surreal sense of normalcy was returning. The only problem that faced them now was the bodies of the dark forces. Most of the light side refused to touch the bodies of their enemies as the entire blame for this whole tragic chapter of history could be laid at their feet.

The new Minister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt, met with the defenders and tried his best to convince them to bury the dead from the dark forces as well but it met with quite a bit of resistance and everyone refused to bury them across from the fallen heroes. The road fell under the control of the school and Headmistress McGonagall absolutely refused to allow any of the dark souls to taint the ground on which the school stood.

The next few days would prove difficult as the Headmistress grew frustrated with the Ministry and their lackluster performance at getting any help up to the castle. She knew Kingsley had his hands full restoring the Ministry to some kind of working order but she grew even more frustrated and felt as if the place that was hit the hardest was being left to fend for itself. She made one final floo call to Kingsley before her frustration took over and she took matters in her own hands.

Being the Headmistress gave her certain powers that she decided to take full advantage of. She began her task by gathering as many stones as she could. When she had a good sized pile, she waved her wand over them and turned them into portkeys. The people remaining in the castle began picking up the stones and placing them on top of the bodies. Every thirty minutes from that point on saw a group of bodies disappear as she activated an area and sent them to the atrium of the Ministry of Magic. Kingsley called her on the floo that night and protested but he had known her long enough to know that when she set her mind to a task, there was no deterring her. He also knew she was in the right with her actions but as he was short staffed, he couldn't spare anyone yet to go and help her with the problem.

With the pile of bodies rising, Kingsley cleared and sealed the atrium. He then recruited the help of the Unspeakables that had returned. He held no sympathy for the darker families or the people they lost and with help, began floating the bodies to the Veil Room and pushing them through. He knew it was a drastic measure that if revealed would cause him many problems in the future but there would be no trace of the scourge that had plagued his country for the last few years. In the end, he knew he wouldn't have any problems sleeping at night in spite of his actions.

When they were finished, Kingsley turned to the Unspeakables. "Anyone have a problem with what we just did?"

The Head Unspeakable stepped forward. "Not a bit."

He nodded. "Good, I'd hate to have to order you to obliviate yourselves. By the way, this is declared top secret and covered by your oaths."

The Head Unspeakable chuckled. "Let us know if any more come through, we'll take care of them."

"Thanks Croaker."

"Should I contact Minnie and see when she thinks she'll be done?"

"You do that and maybe even direct her portkeys a little better to where they land in here. Tell her I really am sorry we couldn't help more."

**HL**

As the body clean-up ended, the residents turned their attention towards the castle. After the funerals and burials, the air in Hogwarts was still at an all time low and the grumbling began. While they struggled to restore some semblance of order in the castle while many of their own homes lay in ruins, a good many became resentful of the rest of Wizarding Britain and only saw them off celebrating their sacrifice. A small group began to resent the outside world as they felt they were not being honored for their actions by an ungrateful nation and caused the feelings to spread. As this was going on, they never cast a thought for the one who lay in a coma in the hospital wing and who had sacrificed the most of any of them.

**HL**

Luna Lovegood sat and listened to their grumbling for a week before she finally heard enough of it. Most of what they were complaining about was exactly the same thing they had done to Harry over the years. She stood from her seat at one of the tables in the Great Hall where Ron was spouting this garbage and as she started to move away, the dreaded voice called out to her. "Luna, where are you going?"

Luna's musical voice came back. "Oh, I just needed some fresh air. It seems the green eyed dungcasters are choking me up again."

It took a few minutes before Hermione caught on to what Luna said and she also rose from her seat and followed Luna out onto the grounds. "What was all that about Luna?"

She gazed off in the distance. "Oh nothing, I just have trouble dealing with foul air sometimes."

Hermione's eyes narrowed. "I may not be as close to you as Harry is but I do understand you. If you have something to say, you should just come out with it."

"I don't think that would be a very good idea Hermione."

She huffed out. "And why not?"

Luna's eyes locked on Hermione's. "Because most of you would not like to hear what I have to say."

Hermione didn't back down from Luna's gaze. "I'm standing here listening."

"You of all people don't want to hear what I have to say."

Hermione's eyes narrowed. "Why would that be?"

"Because you broke your promise to always stand beside Harry when you abandoned him in the forest and followed that jealous fool."

"Is that what he said?"

"Of course not. All he said was that he and Ron had a fight and that you both left him to complete his tasks on his own. Harry is lying in the hospital wing at this moment because he depleted his magical core doing a job that he should never have had to do alone."

Hermione growled. "He didn't know what he was doing and if you were so concerned, why didn't you join him?"

"You know very well I am underage and would have called attention to him and he told you he didn't know any more before you left. I know because I was there."

Hermione quietly said. "We were wasting our time."

"And yet the task is done, Tom is dead, and Harry's lying up there in a coma while you and Ron have moved on with your lives. I hope he's worth it Hermione."

Hermione just stood there staring at Luna for a few minutes. Luna stood there in silence until she realized Hermione was not going to say anything else. She finally put a harsh tone to her voice. "Know this Granger, if Harry doesn't survive this, I will personally write an article exposing your and Ron's part in the downfall of the 'chosen one.' Once I'm done with the both of you, you'll have to stop shagging long enough to get as far away from here as you can because if the rest of the wizarding world doesn't come for you, I promise you I will."

Hermione huffed. "Like I'm afraid of _you_?"

"You'd better be because if I find you first, they will never find your bodies."

"You're going dark!"

"Harry was right, you were so far up Dumbledore's arse you're starting to spout the same crap he did. What you may call dark, I call getting justice for a fallen friend. Isn't that what you did to Pansy after she killed your secret lover Ginny?"

"I…I'll tell Harry."

Luna smiled. "Why don't you do that? I stayed with him after he rescued me from Malfoy Manor. When we would lie in his bed talking after making love, he would tell me that as soon as he got rid of Tom, he was going after everyone who betrayed him."

When Luna turned and walked away from her, Hermione actually earned her title of 'brightest witch' when she kept her mouth shut. As soon as she was out of sight, Hermione hurried to the Great Hall. She sat back down beside Ron and began telling about her talk with Luna. As she told her story, those surrounding her grew uneasy as they heard a tale of facing a pissed off Harry Potter who was looking to take care of the people who had betrayed him. The fact that he destroyed the most feared dark lord in recent history left little doubt as to the possibility of whether they could survive a duel against him.

Many sat thinking of their relationship with Harry and if they had done anything to incur his wrath. They had watched him take down Tom and wanted nothing like that coming for them. Molly Weasley paled as she thought of all the gold she had taken from his vaults. Even though Albus told her to, she still did it even though she knew it was wrong. She was also thinking about the potions she had given Ginny to ensnare the heir to the Potter fortune even though she knew her daughter didn't love him and was in fact in love with Hermione. If Harry knew about those things, her entire family would be in danger. She thought that there was no way he could possibly know but decided to not take the chance.

The entire Weasley family except for George and Charlie got up and left the Great Hall. Molly gave them a glare that was intended to make them come along but they remained seated. Arthur began to levitate Fred's body out of the Great Hall when George's voice stopped him.

"Leave Freddie, you aren't honorable enough to prepare him properly and I won't have you sullying his remains or using his death to show how great your family is."

Arthur looked on in shock and then placed Fred's body back where it was. As soon as they cleared the doors, they headed across the grounds with Hermione leading the way. Bill and Fleur walked along with them not willing to take the chance that their hiding Ron and Hermione in their home would be taken as a betrayal.

Percy hesitated in the Great Hall. He knew he deserved Harry's ire for the way he had treated him over the years but was torn when Penny didn't move from her seat. With one last look at her, he made his decision and ran after his family. She watched him for a second before shrugging her shoulders and turning her attention to the red-headed dragon wrangler in front of her.

As the Weasleys were leaving, the gist of the conversation quickly spread throughout the Great Hall and one by one, people started leaving.

Hannah Abbott saw the writing on the wall. She had been in the DA but it didn't go unnoticed that Harry remained distant with her. Although Susan begged her to do it many times, Hannah never apologized for her actions towards Harry before fifth year. She even knew that Harry distanced himself from Neville when they started dating in sixth year. Although Neville never said anything, she thought there were times when she saw the regret in his eyes. All this ran through her head in an instant and she quickly rose. She held out her hand to Neville who just sat there and looked at her.

"Come on Neville. I know I've wronged Harry and I don't want to be here when he wakes up."

Neville sat there for a minute. "Then I guess you'd better leave."

She stomped her foot. "Aren't you coming?"

He looked at her like she was stupid. "Why should I? I have nothing to fear from Harry."

"But I'm your girlfriend."

"Yeah about that…it was fun while it lasted Hannah but…well Harry taught me something a long time ago and sadly it just registered. It's a little muggle saying that goes like this…bro's before ho's."

She huffed. "What does that mean?"

"Well, it means that I betrayed Harry by dating you in the first place. I won't do screw up like that again."

She cried out "But you said you loved me."

Neville laughed. "Hell Hannah, I told Romilda I loved her when she had her face buried in my lap."

"UGH...Fine then…Susan, are you coming?"

"Sorry Han but no…I'm good…me and Harry have no problems with each other."

Hannah burst into tears and ran out of the Great Hall. Ernie MacMillan took one look at his girlfriend of the last two years and got up and left the hall without saying a word. Those that were left took a look around the hall and noticed that the crowd was a lot thinner than before.

Susan moved around the table and sat next to Neville. "So...Mr. Hero…I hear you're single again."

Neville smiled at her. "Yeah it looks that way…interesting that you are too."

She smiled and then placed her hand on his.

**HL**

Luna strolled around the castle for a little bit before making her way to the hospital ward. As soon as she got inside, she was met by Madam Pomfrey.

"Are there any changes in Harry?"

"He's still asleep dear but his core is almost fully recharged. I was thinking about letting him rejoin the living."

Luna looked down sheepishly. "May I do it?"

"Of course dear. I can't say how much I appreciate all the help you have given me these last few weeks."

"I was glad to do it and it also allowed me to spend more time with him."

Poppy handed her the vial but she handed it back. "Maybe you should go ahead and get something to eat while he's still asleep. I'll sit with him while you're gone."

"Perhaps you're right. He does make an exhausting patient when he is awake."

She left the ward that only had Harry in it at this point. Luna sat down beside him and took his hand in hers. She didn't say anything and just held on to the one person who made her feel like she mattered. She was so lost in her thoughts that an hour passed quickly and Poppy walked back into the ward.

Poppy held the vial in front of Luna's face trying to bring her out of her thoughts. When she looked up, she gave Poppy a nervous smile before taking it in her hand. "Everything will be fine dear. But good luck anyway."

Poppy stepped out from behind the partition to give them privacy. He was hidden away to stop the people who kept coming by to gawk at him as he lie in the coma. When he was first brought in, his body was basically one giant bruise with many cuts and lacerations covering most of his body. Luna had patiently applied the healing salves and creams to his body while Poppy was inundated with so many wounded. Although Poppy over saw her work, she allowed Luna to take over most of Harry's care. For Luna, it was a labor of love to bring her beloved back to her.

Luna stood and looked at the peaceful expression on his face that had been so rare in the last few years. The first time she saw it was late one night after he had fallen asleep and she lay there watching him and it was the expression she most wanted him to wear for the rest of his life. She leaned over and kissed his lips before prying the vial open and pouring it in his mouth. She performed the many times repeated task of massaging his throat so that he would swallow. With her job done, she took his hand in both of hers and waited.

She began to softly speak to him. "I just want you to know that I love you Harry Potter and I vow to always be there for you whether you want me or not. Ever since we met, you've always saved me in one way or another. When I had no friends, you became one. When I was being picked on, you stood up for me and made the bullies back away. When I needed to learn how to be strong enough to stand at your side, you taught me. When I was captured and on the verge of being killed, you came and rescued me. When they killed daddy and left me all alone, you gave me the love I needed to get through it. No one could ever hold the place you hold in my heart."

Luna sat there for a little while before she felt Harry's hand tense in hers. She gave his a little squeeze before moving closer to him. She leaned down and whispered in his ear. "It's time to wake up Harry. You've killed the bad guy and now it's time to live the life you've always dreamed about."

She watched as his mouth curled into a smile before his eyes opened. His hand squeezed hers back as he whispered out "water." She turned and grabbed the glass from the table beside his bed and held it to his lips. As he began to drink greedily she said "Not so much, love. Your tummy is empty and it will just come back up."

He smacked his mouth a few times and whispered out "My mouth feels like I licked a troll's ass. Breath charm?"

She pulled her wand from behind her ear and cast the charm into his mouth. He gave her a grin before smacking his mouth again. "Better but you'd better do it again."

As Luna performed the charm once again, Poppy stuck her head behind the partition. "I thought I heard voices but please spare me the tale of how you would know what a troll's ass tastes like. It's nice to see you back with us Mr. Potter."

"As much time as we have spent together, would you please start calling me Harry? I mean…you've seen me naked more often than…well anyone."

Luna mumbled "Not for long love."

Poppy was chuckling at their antics and drew her wand to cast a patronus that shot off towards the Great Hall. When it landed in front of Minerva, all it said was "He's awake."

Several more people looked around and then got up and left the Great Hall. Minerva chuckled and rose from her seat to go check on her favorite cub. As she walked to the hospital ward, she thought on the Golden Trio and how they had captured her heart seven years ago. It saddened her that Ronald lost his position as one of her favorites in fourth year but she was fine with Harry and Hermione remaining close to her heart. She then had another shock as Hermione lost her spot there during sixth year and had fallen further since then until only Harry remained. She thought she may have to amend her list as it seemed Luna was quickly becoming a favorite of hers with the way she stood by Harry's side.

Harry chuckled at Poppy's comment and remained lying back on the bed with his eyes closed. He reached out and fumbled for Luna's hand and once he had it once again, he pulled her over to him and then pulled her close. When he was satisfied that she was right where he wanted her, he slowly opened his eyes.

His eyes came into focus on Luna's face and a grin lit his face. Quicker than she expected, he pulled her face to his and tenderly kissed her lips. The kiss lasted for several minutes and when their lips separated, he put his forehead against hers. "I love you too Moon baby. Those blue eyes were the first I wanted to see so how could you ever think I would ever want anyone else?"

In her joy, she wrapped her arms tightly around him. The hug lasted for several minutes before he said "I know this is sudden…but…I'm tired of being alone…will you…"

"Yes Harry Potter"

"I haven't asked a question yet."

"The answer will still be yes."

Harry smiled. "Okay then Miss-I-See-Everything…what was the question?"

She smiled back. "That's easy Mr. Potter, you were going to ask me to marry you and go live on the island your godfather left you where we can run around naked all day. Before long, we will have lots of crazy little Potter babies running around but that isn't for a few years as we will be practicing our technique several times a day until we can do it right."

Harry looked at her with mirth in his eyes. "Well, that beats the hell out of asking you to be my girlfriend and having to go through the whole uncomfortable fondling stage."

"Oh, you will do that too but I don't think it will be uncomfortable. I've gotten used to sharing a bed with you these last few months and I don't want to give that up now. Oh and I may have told Granger that we've been doing more than sleeping together."

Harry smiled up at her. "Okay…well it's not like I really care what she thinks anymore…can we talk about less pleasant things for a minute?"

"Of course my future husband."

"Hogwarts next year?"

"Yes, I would like us both to finish our educations since we've come this far. Besides, I think that between my future husband and me, we have eliminated most of the infestation that plagued the castle."

Minerva had arrived in time for the last of this conversation and added. "I would say so…once Miss Granger returned to the Great Hall and told her story…there has been a mass exodus from the castle."

Harry's mirth filled eyes turned to Luna. "What did you tell her?"

"I just simply said that you once told me that once you took care of Tom, you were going to go after those who had betrayed you. I might have mentioned publishing an article in the Quibbler about the true role she and the weasel played. I told her it was my opinion that this victory may have never happened thanks to them and how they were just as responsible for the downfall of the 'chosen one' as Tom was." (She blushed) "I may have also said that I was very good at hiding bodies."

Harry laughed. "Brilliant!"

Luna smiled. "Would you expect anything less from the future Mrs. Potter? Besides, you know what you did and I won't allow you or anyone else to harm my property again. You're all I have left Harry. I almost lost you this time and I don't want to go through that again."

Harry squeezed her hand. "That's fine with me Luna. I've done enough fighting to last a lifetime so I'm done with that unless someone comes after us. At this point, my plans center on chasing my future wife around the forest and doing nasty things to her when I catch her."

Luna blushed. "What makes you think you would have to chase me?"

Minerva and Poppy chuckled at what they were hearing. Minerva finally said "No more thoughts of being an Auror?"

Harry looked up at her. "Oh hell no…I wouldn't work for the Ministry if you paid me a million galleons a year. Besides, if they knew the things we've done, they wouldn't want me anyway."

Poppy pulled up a chair. "This sounds like a good one."

Harry looked at Luna. "You haven't told them what we did at Malfoy Manor?"

"I thought it was our secret."

"Well, it's not like we used Unforgivables or anything and I thought our solution was rather fitting."

Minerva then was then sitting in her own chair. "Do tell."

Harry smiled. "We must have had a great transfiguration teacher because…"

Luna cut him off. "Oh tell it right love. Harry learned they had captured me and came in with wands blazing. He had everyone down and then came and broke down my prison door and then lifted me in his arms and gallantly carried me back up and then apparated me to his bed…"

Harry laughed. "Yeah…they captured me but didn't check me for an extra wand…they started arguing about who would call old Tom so while they worked all that out, they stuck me in the cell with Luna. They had just told her that they had killed Xeno so she was a bit upset. I pulled my extra wand and unlocked the door. I then crept up the stairs and used a wide area stun spell on the lot of them. Luna came up behind me and well we…"

"We transfigured them into dung and then flushed them. My Harry then took me in his arms and whisked me away to his bedroom where we made…"

"LUNA…we did no such thing…well yet."

She smiled at him while the ladies were laughing. Minerva finally said. "A fitting punishment if you ask me."

Harry looked at her. "So, they all ran?"

"Oh yes, Miss Granger and the Weasleys were the first out the door except for George and Charlie. I don't know if you know but Frederick didn't survive the battle. There was then a string of people leaving ever since and a few more when Poppy's message arrived. I really didn't think a lot of them had anything to worry about but I guess they didn't want to take the chance."

Harry nodded. "Well at least I won't have to deal with those idiots right away."

"Oh poo…I was looking forward to it."

Harry chuckled. "Well if it means that much to you…I'm sure we can work them in between practices."

Luna's face lit up and she lunged for Harry and placed a hard kiss on his lips. "You're such a good future husband. Besides, I think chasing them down will make me rather frisky."

Harry just sat there and smiled at her while the ladies laughed at him. Poppy sat back for a second and turned her attention to Luna. "So, I see you finally found that elusive creature you have been searching for."

"I have…but I don't think the horn will stay crumpled very much."


End file.
